Moments
by SonyaShulen
Summary: I love his brother, not him. But he cares a lot for his brother as well. Everything was shattered when he jumped and I got a slap.


**MOMENTS**

I was engaged to Ryosuke. But I love his brother Natsume. Natsume loves his brother a lot as well but he also loves me. It's a really painful triangle we have there. But it just seems that we will never have a happy ending how Cinderella, Little Mermaid and Belle got theirs. My life was never a fairy tale and will never be like one. Ryosuke loves me as well and he's really sweet. I like him, but I don't love him. He's like, my elder brother. It felt bad to feel this way towards him but it's the truth. I had always met up with him at his house only for the sake to be with Natsume. Natsume was always happy to see me, but when he sees me with Ryosuke together, his mind turns bitter.

I decided to take the first step and it was a wrong choice. That step caused everybody's happiness to be ruined, including Natsume's and mine.

"_Ryosuke," I called out to him._

"_Mikan," he smiled and took my hands into his._

_I took my hands out of his and said, "Sorry,"_

"_Why? What's wrong?" he was confused._

"_Ryosuke, I..I don't love you, I'm sorry for keeping this from you," I admitted to him truthfully._

"_You..you don't love me? Why? Can you tell me the reason why, Mikan? Is it because I don't love you enough?" he asked me. Tears forming in his eyes._

"_No! You're really nice and you love me too much. I'm happy. I love you too, but as an older brother. I love..I love your brother, and he loves me as well," I looked towards the ground._

"_You love Natsume? How long have you been keeping this from me?" he asked me. "Look at me!"_

_I shot my face up to him and figures – he was crying. "It had been, quite a long time already," I said to him._

"_I hate you. I hate all of you! So much for loving both you and my brother," he spat at me and ran away._

That was, the last time I saw him. That same day, at night, I was watching the news on the television.

"_Ryosuke Hyuuga – the deputy president of the Hyuuga Business Cooperation had just died from jumping down a 7 storey building building about two hours ago! He's currently on the way to King's Hospital for the forensic checkup."_

_I was confused. I wanted to call Natsume and ask him was it really Ryosuke? It can't be. He died because of me, he died because I broke his heart. I took my bag and quickly got a taxi to go to the hospital. I felt bad I wanted to kill myself for that! _

_When I reached the hospital, I saw Natsume and his family members there. I felt guilty. The first person that came to me was Natsume._

"_You were the last person that he saw," he just stated. "He told me before he went to see you," his throat was dry._

"_Yes," I just answered him._

"_What did you tell him?" he asked me, a slight of anger was seen in his eyes._

"_I told him, I lov-" I started and a sharp slap was given across my face. I looked into his eyes and saw his tears accumulating with tears again._

_  
"Why? Do you have any idea how long he tried to make his proposal for you to marry him to be perfect? Do you have any idea how long he took to pick a diamond ring for you!?" he shouted at me and leaned his body against the wall to support him._

_I truly didn't know. This was the first time I was slapped and I deserved it. Tears were running up to my eyes. I was sad. "I'm sorry," I told him and to his family._

_I knew that I was no longer accepted to his family. I was alone, yet again. Was it really my fault? I walked away and tears started streaming down. I got a taxi back to my apartment and started packing my clothes. I was now called, a murderer. Not physically, but mentally. I wanted to run far away, I wanted to be away from all this mess even though I know that this guilt will haunt me for the rest of my life. _

_My cell rang and I picked it up._

"_Mikan, I'm sor-" it was Natsume._

_I quickly hung up the call because I can't accept his sorry. I don't deserve apologies from him. I owe him an apology instead. I locked my luggage and went out of the apartment. I paid the rent just enough for the length I've stayed there and took a cab to the airport._

Well, here I am, the airport. Waiting for the ticket office to be open so I could get a ticket to fly off somewhere. I decided that I should go somewhere, not well known, I went to Denali at Alaska. Staying away from the Hyuuga family, staying away from who I am. Leaving my soul behind. When I boarded the aeroplane, I reminiscence the time when Natsume promised me he would go with me to Switzerland after he arranged the cancellation of my engagement with Ryosuke. That promise could never be fulfilled now.

I got my phone out of my pocket and saw 18 new messages. I went through them and they were all from Natsume. It was all, "Sorry". I felt bad. I decided to reply his message;

'You shouldn't apologize. It's my fault. I'm sorry. Goodbye' and I pressed SEND.

I shut my phone and the plane departed. I'm leaving everything behind. I feel like, a sinner. I broke someone's heart, and that someone just died. I broke the somebody's brother's heart and that person can't stop apologizing to me even though he knew it was my fault that his brother died. I broke my own heart for being an idiot and this idiocy brought death to our hearts.

I started crying. The person sitting beside me looked at me and asked me whether I'm alright.

"I'm alright, thank you," I said between sobs. She did not listen to me but she pat my back trying to stop my constant sobbing.

* * *

© Plot by SonyaShulen and anime/manga by Higuchi Tachibana

I might have some typing error here so please tell me if there are.

Yet another dream. I might need to see a psychiatrist or someone that could tell me what my dreams are telling me. Hehe.. I know this is short but I just want to upload it. I actually ran out of words. Please **DO **review and tell me if you want Natsume's POV on this one because I would need to think something out for his POV. I really have no idea how he would feel

And read my other stories too! "**20 Things I Did Before I Die**" , "**The Now Or Latter**" , "**Takin Back My Love [ONESHOT]**"!

Thanks!


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